


Freeze

by fruitspunchsamuraiGdis



Category: Gintama
Genre: Fluff, Ginzura - Freeform, Love, M/M, Romance, Sad, Slow Build, gintama - Freeform, i love them, its cute really
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-17
Updated: 2019-04-17
Packaged: 2020-01-15 11:48:24
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,525
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18498343
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fruitspunchsamuraiGdis/pseuds/fruitspunchsamuraiGdis
Summary: He hears it once more, and it’s faint.Katsura scurries, rushing to the door in a haze of worry.He opens it, and thinksplease please please be okay.The silver haired man stands at the door, blood stains on his cheek and his clothes. He looks like he hasn’t slept, and Katsura doesn’t have time to take it all in. The shaking of his hands, the shallow breathing he emits, and the way he drops his sword at the door.The black haired man’s mouth opens in shock, and he doesn’t know how to talk anymore. His eyes widen and Gintoki stares, pauses as if he were taking it in, before smiling.“I’m home.”





	Freeze

Snow covered the ground in which he sat on, reducing him to nothing but a shivering mess. He breathed out, cheeks flushed from the cold and eyes blurry. 

He heard a slight sound from the distance. 

Is this how he would die? 

He could no longer feel his fingers, as they trailed onto the cold floor. 

_“Thank you.”_

His vision began to fill with black spots, and his eyes slowly starting to close—

“Oi.” 

A warm hand pressed against his cheek, and suddenly he regained feeling in his body again. 

He looked up, and the black haired man stared right back, eyes boring into his own. 

“You’re not supposed to nap in graveyards.” 

He wishes he could form a laugh at the man’s words. 

Instead he fell forward into his arms, blacking out. 

 

-

 

Blurry eyes shot open at the sound of clanking. 

The man sat up still, rubbing his head as he scanned over where he was. A blanket was draped over his lap, slipping off of his chest. 

He froze as he heard footsteps, eyes wary of his surroundings. 

The same man from before. He held something in his hands, smoothly entering the room. 

“You’re awa—“ The man lost his footing, yelping as he caught the bowl. 

The silver haired man’s guard immediately dissipated at the sight of the idiotic man. 

He regained his composure, setting it in front of him. The bowl was now half filled with soup, the rest of the contents somewhere amongst the floor. 

The silver haired man squinted. 

“It’s soup, you paa-head.” 

His gaze immediately shot up to the man, eyes locking with brown ones. 

He cleared his throat. 

“Your hair looks like a black mop.” 

“It’s not black mop, it’s Katsura!”

“Katsura.” The man tried the name on his tongue, giving him a distasteful look. He picked up the bowl, smelling it. 

“I didn’t poiso—“ 

The long haired man, Katsura, stopped speaking as the perm head drank it quickly, his spoon falling on the floor, untouched. He could hear the silver haired man’s stomach growl as he drank it all. 

Then he set it down. 

“That’s too long,” He mumbled, staring longingly at the empty bowl before his eyes reached back up to the other man’s. 

“I’ll call you Zura.”

 

-

 

Katsura hung the man’s shirt to dry on the wooden balcony, watching as he gazed up at the house. 

“You live alone?” 

Katsura straightened his back, making his way over to the door. His silence was answer enough. 

“Let me stay here.” 

Katsura stopped, hand on the door knob. 

“Oh? What’s in it for me?” 

“I’ll protect you.” 

Katsura smiled, moving his head back now to meet the silver haired man’s eyes. 

“Protect me?” 

“Aren’t you lonely all by yourself, Zura?”

“It’s not Zura, it’s Katsura.” 

“Gintoki.” He said quietly, and Katsura paused. 

“Gintoki?” 

“My name.” 

“It’s fitting.” He replied, eyes skimming over silver hair.

 

-

 

“You don’t have any family?”

Gintoki shook his head. 

“I lived with my sensei.” 

Gintoki didn’t speak anymore than that, and Katsura didn’t press further. 

“Yours?” 

Katsura unintentionally mimicked Gintoki, shaking his head as well. 

“They died.” 

“This their house?” 

Katsura smiled solemnly, expression masked. 

“No, it was burned down”.

A thick silence shrouded the room, air tense. 

Gintoki launched a pebble straight at Katsura’s face. 

The black haired man let out a hurt noise, covering his nose at the stinging sensation. 

“Why’d you do that for, you stupid paa-head?” 

Gintoki said nothing as the man fussed at him, complaining about how much it hurt. 

He didn’t like how Zura looked when he was sad. 

 

-

 

“Oi, Zura.” 

A mop of black hair peeked out of the water. 

“What?”

“You’re taking up too much space, move.” Gintoki shoved him, the man yelping. 

Katsura gripped his foot as he fell, dragging him underneath the water. 

Gintoki came back up spluttering, trying to breathe. 

“Are you an idiot?!” 

“It’s not idiot, it’s Katsura.” 

Gintoki paused, eyes lingering briefly on Katsura’s hair. 

Katsura cocked his head in confusion. 

“What?”

“There‘s no difference between you and an idiot.” 

Katsura huffed. 

“You look like a fish.”

Gintoki cracked a smile. 

“You smell like one.” 

Katsura laughed lightly. 

“Paa-head.” 

He’s squeezing his clothes, getting out of the water. His feet are lightly scratched from the fall, a light tingling sensation coming from them. 

Gintoki’s eyes flicker over them for a second, then he moves closer. 

Katsura tenses up, and the man speaks gently as he gets near him. 

“Come on, I’ll carry you home.” 

Katsura opens his mouth in protest, but Gintoki lifts him up regardless.

Gintoki smiles lightly at the tinge of red in the other man’s cheeks. 

Katsura thinks this is what being spoiled would feel like. 

 

-

 

Gintoki is curious about the house, so when Katsura’s asleep he likes to explore it. 

He goes up the stairs to the empty room and ventures about, finding only a small cardboard box. 

He opens it, thinks he’d probably hate if someone else went through his stuff like this. 

But he does it regardless, finding a single photograph of a much younger Katsura. He’s smiling, and Gintoki wonders who took it. He flips the back, finding a lone word written on the picture. 

_Noble_

He sets it back in the box, thinking the idiot was anything but that. 

His finger tips press against something else as he sets the photos back, and there’s beads this time too. The thread that held them was torn, leaving them scattered across the cardboard. 

Gintoki closes it without another word, pushing it back where it was. 

He smiles, turning his head. 

“How long are you going to stand on the door and spy on me, Zura?” 

Katsura doesn’t have the energy to correct him, just rubs his eyes sleepily as he pops out from the doorway. 

“Says the paa-head who’s looking through my stuff.” 

 

-

 

“Your birthday?” 

Katsura nods as Gintoki holds onto his wooden sword, forgetting how they’d even gotten to the topic. 

“My grandmother would bring me a bead every year and put it on that string.”

Gintoki frowned. 

“Why’d you stop wearing it?” 

Katsura looks at his wrist. 

“Ah, I—“ Katsura stopped abruptly, and Gintoki thinks he’s overstepped some boundary. 

He opens his mouth to apologize but Katsura’s up and talking anyways. 

“My family was of high status,” Katsura sighs for a moment like the entire topic was giving him a headache. 

“After my parents died, they burned down our house, and there my grandmother…”

He doesn’t continue, and he doesn’t have to. 

Gintoki already knows.

His grandmother had died there. 

“It tore during the fire, and I haven’t worn it since.” 

Katsura stills like he’s somewhere else for a moment. 

“Before the fire, they said my mother died of an illness, and my father caught the same one around the time, but—“ 

A short pause. 

“—I was sure that wasn’t what happened.” 

Gintoki felt something churn in his stomach. 

“We had only one butler, but he acted strange up until my mother’s death, and then when my father…” His voice comes to an aching pause. 

There was something like dread in his tone. 

“Poison.” The word fell from Gintoki’s lips, and Katsura smiled bitterly. 

He took in a breath before speaking again. 

“I killed him.” 

Katsura’s eyes were hardened now. He looks at his hands, as if they’re stained. 

“I didn’t… I wasn’t…” He looked helpless, as if he was trying to find some explanation for himself. 

Gintoki was silent. 

Was there something he could say? Words that could make that look leave Katsura’s face. Something…

Anything. 

Katsura jolted up when Gintoki’s hands were suddenly sat atop his own palms. And he was grabbing them, tugging forward lightly like he wanted to snap him away from whatever he was thinking. 

He sat dumbfounded as the silver haired samurai looked at him so seriously. 

“I…” 

He drew a blank line. 

What could he say? 

_I’m here._

A small laugh slipped from Katsura’s mouth, lips turning upward into a smile. 

“What are you doing you paa head?” 

“I…”

Gintoki looked completely serious, so Katsura leaned forward, bumping his forehead to the other man’s. He smiled again, chuckling again at something Gintoki couldn’t understand. 

“I know, you idiot.” 

 

-

 

Gintoki shuffled awkwardly with the string in his hands, sitting on the floor with his legs crisscrossed. He fumbled with it, almost dropping it when Katsura walked in. 

“What is it?” 

“Ah… never mind…” 

Katsura frowned. 

“What?” 

He held it in his left hand. 

_Does he even want it? Wouldn’t it make him angry that I messed with it?_

“Never mind.” Gintoki mumbled, trying to stand. 

Katsura was grabbing his arm, trying to pull him back. 

“Wait.” 

“Zura, let go—“ 

The black haired idiot refused, tripping himself on Gintoki’s leg, falling down with the silver haired man. Whatever was in Gintoki’s hands fell as well, hitting the floor. 

Katsura’s eyes trailed over to it, and Gintoki’s face went red. 

“Oh.” 

Gintoki pulled up to grab it again, but Katsura smacked his head down, reaching for it. 

He pulled it up, staring at the new addition. 

Katsura didn’t look angry. 

“This is… for me?”

Gintoki’s cheeks darkened to a rosy red. 

“I was thinking… since you have nobody to give you beads for your birthday anymore and I’m here… So I got a new string for it, and…” 

Katsura fingers touched the silver bead on it, along with all of his older ones. 

“Anyway, give it back, it’s—“ 

“No.” Katsura said all too quickly, holding it closer. 

“Zura, it’s—“

“I want it.” 

Gintoki started silently at Katsura’s unreadable expression. 

The long haired man looked away, eyes fixated on the bracelet in his hands. He put it around his wrist, and Gintoki could see the tips of the man’s ears turning red. 

He was happy. 

“I’ll… go get food started.” Gintoki was out of the room, not having time to see Katsura’s small nod. 

His heart beat was spiraling out of control, a small smile planted on his lips as he covered his face with his hands. 

He didn’t see the tears in Katsura’s eyes either. 

 

-

 

Katsura doesn’t sleep some nights. 

He knows Gintoki doesn’t either. 

He gets up at night when he hears thrashing and heavy breathing, and finds Gintoki still asleep, chest going up and down heavily, small, uncomfortable sounds leaving his mouth. 

He’s scared. 

When Katsura calls his name, moves his hand to the man’s forehead, his eyes fly open and he looks like he’s seen a ghost. 

The two sit there in silence, until Gintoki’s breathing calms down and Katsura can’t hear it anymore. 

Gintoki speaks first. 

“I was in the war… with the amanto.” His voice is low. 

“You joined the war?” 

Gintoki nods shakily. 

“My sensei was captured by them, so I went to get him back.” 

He trembles a bit, as if the thought entered his brain again. 

“When I made it they asked me to save either him or another student of his.”

Katsura’s breathing is still. 

“I knew what he wanted to protect… or what he cared about I should say.” 

Katsura knows what’s next. 

”So I killed him.” 

He isn’t moving anymore, eyes on Gintoki’s figure. 

“Zura.”

He looks up, meets his eyes and thinks he feels his heart skip a beat. 

Gintoki’s fingers take lazy circles into Katsura’s wrist, and the black haired man only leans closer. 

“I want to protect what I have now.” 

Gintoki gives a small smile, and Katsura finds himself leaning on his shoulder. 

“What are you doing, Zura?”

“I’m sleeping next to you, you paa-head.”

Gintoki’s eyes glimmer with something unreadable, and he lays back down, closing his eyes. 

“Do what you want, mop head.” 

“It’s not mop head, it’s Katsura!” 

Gintoki’s chest filled up with something warm at the familiar words, and yawns. 

Katsura never sleeps in his own room again. 

 

-

 

“Fireworks?”

Gintoki somehow agrees to go. 

Katsura is tripping more than usual, so Gintoki thinks he’s excited. 

It’s dark out, Gintoki barely able to see in front of him as Katsura moves a little faster. 

The black haired man tugs his hand all the way there, almost dropping the two of them multiple times. 

“Zura, we’re not going to mis—“

“Look, it’s almost starting!” 

When they make it to the top of the hill, Gintoki arches an eyebrow. 

“We’re on the wrong side.” He frowns. 

Katsura shakes his head. 

“The best view is here, paa-head!” 

“Did you find this place by yourself?” 

Katsura nods, then realizes he hasn’t let go of Gintoki’s hand. 

His cheeks flame, and he releases his grip on the man’s palm. 

“I—“

He stops abruptly when the silver haired man’s hand is on his own again. His face is red, but Gintoki isn’t facing him. Instead he’s staring straight up. 

“Look, it’s starting.” 

“Oh.” Katsura turns his head, the flashing of the fireworks catching his attention. 

“That one looks like you.” He says, and Gintoki snorts. 

“They all look the same.” 

“The one over there has fish eyes.” 

“Shut up.” Gintoki is smiling as he speaks. 

Katsura says nothing when the other man’s head leans on his shoulder, resting there. 

“I’m sleepy, Zura.”

“It’s not Zura, it’s Katsura.” 

Gintoki intertwines their fingers. 

“I-Idiot.”

“No I’m Gintoki.” 

Katsura leans his head agains the other man’s, and he’s fidgeting with their fingers. 

“Gintoki.” 

The silver haired man hums lowly. 

Katsura’s voice is hushed, unusually quiet when he speaks. 

“Stay with me.” 

 

-

 

Katsura doesn’t know the man, Gintoki calls him Takasugi, so he assumes it’s his name. 

But the look on the silver haired man’s face is serious so Katsura says nothing. 

He feels dread creep into his stomach, and he knows right away that he doesn’t like him. 

He sees Katsura and he smirks like it’s something funny. 

“Playing house, Gintoki?” 

Gintoki grits his teeth. 

Takasugi goes forward, and it’s Katsura’s head he’s aiming for, but Gintoki blocks it, standing in between the two of them like some sort of barrier. 

“Not here.” Gintoki practically growls the words at him. Takasugi has that devilish smile on his lips, and he looks like a madman, Katsura thinks. 

Gintoki’s eyes are different. 

They’re angry, of course, but it’s something else in his eyes. 

Desperation? 

Takasugi backs off, clinging to his sword like it’s the only thing keeping him from launching forward and spilling blood again. 

“I’ll wait for you.” Takasugi speaks and Gintoki is silent, but he’s not disagreeing. 

Takasugi reminds him of a rampant beast. 

“This time, I’ll kill you.” 

And he’s gone without a word. 

Gintoki is dropping his sword and turning toward Katsura now, who looks like he’s been slapped in the face. 

_Kill?_

Gintoki can see the worried expression and he’s shaking his head. 

“I won’t die, Zura.” 

Katsura is still, and something in him aches. 

Gintoki has his hands on his cheeks now, meeting his eyes. 

“Zura…” Its almost a whine, like he’s begging the man. 

_Please_

Katsura feels it once more now. 

He’s _afraid._

He trembles slightly, and his legs feel wobbly. 

“You’ll… come back?” He chokes the words out and it’s more of a question than a statement. 

The silver haired man is watching him carefully, and every inch of Katsura is saying _don’t go._

Gintoki nods his head and he picks up his sword again now. 

“I’ll be back.” 

Then he’s gone too, without another word. 

And Katsura is alone again. 

 

-

 

He can’t sleep, he can’t possibly sleep. 

Not yesterday, and not today. 

Gintoki still hasn’t come back. 

Is he coming back? Did something happen to him? 

Katsura grits his teeth, and he hates how desperate he feels. 

He’s fidgeting with the thread on his fingers, hands stroking over the _G_ , hoping it’ll calm him down somehow. 

 

_Stay with me._

He remembers suddenly, when he found the man nodding over in front of a grave, body frozen and shivering. He remembers how he carried him all the way home, wondering if his heart would collapse. Then when his eyes opened later, and he ate as if he’d been starving. 

Katsura’s heart pounded harder with each memory. 

He remembers Gintoki shoving him into the water, carrying him home when Katsura complained after, and then he remembers how he held his hand during the fireworks, calm and soothing, yet exhilarating. 

Had he made a mistake? 

A knock on the door jolts his body, and he freezes for a moment, his breath catching in his throat. 

He hears it once more, and it’s faint. 

Katsura scurries, rushing to the door in a haze of worry. 

He opens it, and thinks _please please please be okay._

The silver haired man stands at the door, blood stains on his cheek and his clothes. He looks like he hasn’t slept, and Katsura doesn’t have time to take it all in. The shaking of his hands, the shallow breathing he emits, and the way he drops his sword at the door. 

The black haired man’s mouth opens in shock, and he doesn’t know how to talk anymore. His eyes widen and Gintoki stares, pauses as if he were taking it in, before smiling. 

“I’m home.” 

Katsura’s eyes fill with tears. 

“You stupid paa-head!”

He weakly raises a fist, and Gintoki catches it. Katsura’s vision is blurry and he knows he’s crying but he can’t help it. 

He grips Gintoki’s shoulders as if they’re the only thing keeping him from falling onto his knees and sobbing. His fingers tremble and Gintoki is laughing, pressing quick, gentle kisses all over his face. 

Katsura buries his head down into his chest, and Gintoki smells of sweat, blood, and just stupid Gintoki and he feels his heart swell with emotion. 

His chest heaves slightly, and Katsura’s legs really do give out this time. Gintoki’s grabbing ahold of him, letting their bodies sink down til they’re both on their knees. Katsura forgets how to switch off the tears falling from his eyes and he’s so incredibly happy. 

Soon after it’s Gintoki who hoists up, Gintoki who must’ve been fighting for hours, shuts the door and locks it, carrying Katsura up like he’s as light a feather. 

Katsura’s chest aches when he’s set down, and Gintoki says he needs to take a shower. The black haired man grabs him by the back of his shirt sleeve, refusing to let go of him. 

He ends up in the bathtub, watching Gintoki scrub his hair and complain about how dirty he is. 

His eyes water again and he throws the soap bar at Gintoki when he asks what’s wrong. 

Later he’s carried to the room, and they both fall asleep, curled up in each other’s arms. 

Katsura’s fingers are buried in his shirt, Gintoki’s hugging his head, pressing it to his chest. 

He hears a murmur, a sweet one, whispering lightly. 

“Goodnight, Zura.” 

He doesn’t correct him, doesn’t want to. 

He’d wouldn’t mind hearing Gintoki say Zura for the rest of his life. 

 

-

 

“It’s not Zura, it’s Katsura!” 

“Is that what you called me over here for?” 

Katsura glares, swinging his arms in some weird motion. 

Gintoki’s eyes are on him, then on the scenery behind him. The flowers in the back garden were blooming, full of yellows, blues, and reds. He watched Katsura again now, when the wind blew against his hair, causing it to flow slowly to the right. He can see how the sunlight hits the other man’s face, causing his eyes to shimmer in a way that makes his heart squeeze. 

“No, I wanted to give you something.”

Gintoki watches Katsura fumble with something in his hands. He finally presents it, holding it high for Gintoki to see. 

The thread was black, a silver _K_ hanging on it. 

Katsura’s cheeks go pink, and he looks away, eyes closed and words coming out stumbled. 

“I thought you’d… I mean it’s… I just wanted— _gah_.” 

He stops speaking for a moment, before opening his mouth again. He settles in two words. 

“Happy birthday.” 

Gintoki’s eyes shine for a moment, before he’s reaching forward, grabbing Katsura along with the bracelet. 

“What’re you doing you pa—“

“I’ll stay with you forever.” 

_”Stay with me”_

Katsura’s cheeks are red against Gintoki’s shoulder, and he knows the silver haired man’s smiling. 

Katsura can’t seem to speak now, his heart is beating too fast. 

So he leans up and kisses the other man. 

 

-

 

“Oi, Zura, come on!” 

The black haired man trips, almost landing on his face when Gintoki catches him. 

“What’re you doing, you idiot?” 

Katsura huffs, regaining his footing before following the man. 

_Why was he in such a rush?_

Gintoki stops suddenly, and Katsura recognizes the place. 

“Are there fireworks today?” He stares at the familiar hill where sat at months ago. 

Gintoki shakes his head, standing a little too high on his toes. 

“Gin?” 

The silver haired man’s chest squeezes at the stupid nickname, and he ends up blurting it out. 

“I love you.” 

His faced is red, cheeks rosy, staring at anything except for Katsura now. 

Then he hears a laugh and he sees it. 

Katsura’s cheeks are tinged pink, his hair flowing slowly with the wind.

Gintoki thinks he looks happy. 

“Me too, you paa-head.”

**Author's Note:**

> im a bit happy about this, hope you guys enjoy!


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